Thanks for opening yourself up and sharing this story. I am a firm believer that we can choose our family once we become adults. My blood family gets invited into my circle if they act like people I want to have in my life. There’s no cart-blanch forgiveness for someone just because they’re blood. If you’re verbally abusive, I’m not going to talk to you anymore. Often, when a family has suffered from abuse, they perpetuate a toxic environment and live in denial. I’m sure we all would love to snap our fingers and make that denial disappear, but we can’t. For myself, I’m too busy working on getting myself out of my own denial. I’ve also found that you can’t try to make some kind of sense out of the things family members like your sister say. They’ll do anything to protect themselves from looking at what hurts too much to look at.
I’m sorry you went through all of this, but again, thanks for sharing. I shared a similarly personal story here, although the scenarios and situations described are much different. Nonetheless, I’ve dealt with similar sentiments from certain family members because of my distancing myself from them.